Poem

Phoenix: What have you been doing all afternoon?

Diablo: Thinkin'of poetry.

Phoenix: Oh, boy. This ought to be good.

Diablo: This little piggy went to Mexico, While this little piggy stayed home. And this little piggy got Swine Flu and this little piggy got none.

Phoenix: Wait...Stop right there.

Diablo: Best part coming up.

Phoenix: No...too much TV for you.

Diablo: Rats

This Little Piggy

Phoenix: Did you just sneeze?

Diablo: Yes, Bless me.

Phoenix: You coming down with a cold?

Diablo: No way. Basement dust. Some dust bunnies behind the home heating fuel tank are the size of bears.

Phoenix:

Diablo: Okay, not that big. But big. Trust me. Maybe the size of pigs.

Phoenix:

Diablo: Okay, okay, okay...the size of a stupid cotton ball. What of it?

Phoenix: Just as long as you're sure you didn't catch the swine flue.

Diablo: Hell, I can't even catch a bird. How am I going to catch a swine?

New Territory

Diablo: What's with this new chummie relationship you got going on here?

Phoenix: Oh, it's nothing.

Diablo: Don't give me that. You've taken to sittin' on the Old Man's lap.

Phoenix: So?

Diablo: You don't think she's not coming back do you?

Phoenix: It's been awhile. Hell, there ain't any more snow on the ground and she ain't here.

Diablo: So?

Phoenix: So what?

Diablo: You know. How did it feel?

Phoenix: Warm and toasty.

Diablo: Yeah, I miss sitting on her lap.

Phoenix: Me too.

Spring In The Air

Phoenix: How's that twitter thing working for ya?

Diablo: Lots of cute cats out there. Crazy people too.

Phoenix: Any birds?

Diablo: None I can eat.

Phoenix: So what's the point?

Diablo: Didn't you hear me? Lots of cute cats.

Twitter

Phoenix: What did you do?

Diablo: I signed up on twitter. My twitter character is Southbound Cat

Phoenix: That's original. Why'd you sign up?

Diablo: Twitter. Get it? A bird. I thought it would be something I could eat.

Phoenix: I don't see any feathers hanging out of your mouth.

Diablo: I'm still trying to figure it out. It's more complicated than figuring out how to open a cupboard door.

Phoenix: There's got to be something to eat with twenty million users. Someone is bound to leave a bag of Cheetos behind.


Diablo: That's what I figured. I got followers and things I'm following. But so far...no luck in the food department.

Success

Diablo: Was that luck or skill?

Phoenix: A little of both.

Diablo: I was wondering when you were going to figure it out.

Phoenix: Well, the paint stick was a little on the edge so it didn't take much to push it through the handle.

Diablo: And when it fell through...Wa-La. Access to the food pile!

Phoenix: Chips.

Diablo: Now if you can just figure out how to open the refrigerator. I could use a little salsa on these things.

Here

Phoenix: I think we are going to be here for a while.

Diablo: That's okay. I like New York. I get to go outside to play.

Phoenix: Except that 'udder cat is here too. Yells her head off in the middle of the night. I'm losing my beauty sleep.

Diablo: She is blind as a bat. Walk right up to her and she can't tell you are there. Just don't touch the whiskers.

Phoenix: I'd rather not.

Diablo: You sound a little upset. Why? If you're patient you stand a good chance to get some of that good and stinky canned food she'll leave in her bowl. Something we never get a chance to eat.

Phoenix: That's why you have fish breath.

Diablo: Oops. Is it that bad?