Diablo: She asked me to make a New Year's resolution.
Phoenix: And?
Diablo: She asked me not to bite her anymore.
Phoenix: And?
Diablo: We reached a compromise. I'll try not to break skin.
Phoenix: Tell me how come you are her favorite?
Sunday, December 31, 2006
Saturday, December 30, 2006
South
Diablo: I don't think we are going south.
Phoenix: Okay by me. I hate that traveling gig.
Diablo: Yeah, but look outside. See? There is snow everywhere.
Phoenix: It don't bother me. I'm not going out there.
Diablo: Yeah but...there isn't any more grass to eat.
Phoenix: Diablo, I think you been eating too much rabbit. Rabbits eat grass. You're a cat. You eat rabbit.
Phoenix: Okay by me. I hate that traveling gig.
Diablo: Yeah, but look outside. See? There is snow everywhere.
Phoenix: It don't bother me. I'm not going out there.
Diablo: Yeah but...there isn't any more grass to eat.
Phoenix: Diablo, I think you been eating too much rabbit. Rabbits eat grass. You're a cat. You eat rabbit.
Friday, December 08, 2006
Toilet
Phoenix: What do you see?
Diablo: Nothing.
Phoenix: Let me up there.
Diablo: Careful. Don’t push me.
Phoenix: Well? Are you going to do it?
Diablo: I’m pretty thirsty. I heard dogs do this all the time.
Phoenix: Yuck.
Diablo: It is kind of far down in there. I don’t know if I can reach the water.
Phoenix: Lean way over. Balance. Keep your tail back. Steady. Careful.
Diablo: Nothing.
Phoenix: Let me up there.
Diablo: Careful. Don’t push me.
Phoenix: Well? Are you going to do it?
Diablo: I’m pretty thirsty. I heard dogs do this all the time.
Phoenix: Yuck.
Diablo: It is kind of far down in there. I don’t know if I can reach the water.
Phoenix: Lean way over. Balance. Keep your tail back. Steady. Careful.
Crisis
Diablo: I’m starving.
Phoenix: Me too.
Diablo: How come that lady isn’t coming inside to feed us?
Phoenix: I’m not sure. For some reason she can’t open the door. There is something wrong with the lock.
Diablo: I want something to eat. My belly hurts. It was last night when we had our last meal.
Phoenix: We can prowl around the kitchen and see if we can open something up.
Diablo: Valerie did a pretty good job locking everything up. I haven’t been able to open any cabinets. There isn't nothing on the counter except an onion. I might eat peas, but I got to draw the line on the onion. I’m not that hungry, yet.
Phoenix: We don’t have much water.
Diablo: The toilet…
Phoenix: Don’t even go there.
Phoenix: Me too.
Diablo: How come that lady isn’t coming inside to feed us?
Phoenix: I’m not sure. For some reason she can’t open the door. There is something wrong with the lock.
Diablo: I want something to eat. My belly hurts. It was last night when we had our last meal.
Phoenix: We can prowl around the kitchen and see if we can open something up.
Diablo: Valerie did a pretty good job locking everything up. I haven’t been able to open any cabinets. There isn't nothing on the counter except an onion. I might eat peas, but I got to draw the line on the onion. I’m not that hungry, yet.
Phoenix: We don’t have much water.
Diablo: The toilet…
Phoenix: Don’t even go there.
Sunday, December 03, 2006
No Petting
Phoenix: Where the hell is everybody?
Diablo: I miss Valerie. No snacks. This lady comes in, feeds us, cleans the litter box and leaves. She watches us eat.
Phoenix: That is so you can’t sneak a bite of my food. You and your rabbit and pea diet.
Diablo: You can have some.
Phoenix: I’ll stick to beef and chicken byproducts, thank you.
Diablo: I miss Valerie. No snacks. This lady comes in, feeds us, cleans the litter box and leaves. She watches us eat.
Phoenix: That is so you can’t sneak a bite of my food. You and your rabbit and pea diet.
Diablo: You can have some.
Phoenix: I’ll stick to beef and chicken byproducts, thank you.
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