Diablo: You smell like the vet.
Phoenix: Follow up visit.
Diablo: And?
Phoenix: I like her, Dr. Randall. A bit more gentle than that David guy in New York.
Diablo: Yeah, yeah, yeah... What about your blood work and urine?
Phoenix: You'll be happy to know my numbers are all within the normal range. My BUN also known as Urea Nitorgen, Creatinine and Phosphorus are well within the ranges. Very different from three weeks ago.
Diablo: Wow.
Phoenix: Wow is right. No more injections.
Diablo: How about sharing that KD diet with me?
Phoenix: I heard you need to lose a little weight. Vet actually said I needed to gain some.
Diablo: I've been starving ever since we left New York. Rumor has it we are due for shots next month.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Home
Diablo: Smells the same. Home sweet Home!
Phoenix: You mean to tell me after all that we are right back where we started from?
Diablo: Appears that way. Ain't it great?
Phoenix: What was that all about?
Diablo: I don't know. Guess it was just about a vacation.
Phoenix: Let me see. Six days in a car. Shabby hotel rooms. Trying to use a litter box at 70 miles per hour. Tractor Trailer rumbling by. You hissing at me. Getting tossed to the back seat if I tried to get on the dashboard. Injections between the shoulder blades. Getting dragged out from underneath a bed by the scruff of the neck...or tail as was the case this morning.
Diablo: You know a lot of that could've been avoided.
Phoenix: Yeah, if we just stayed home in the first place.
Diablo: You know what I can't figure out?
Phoenix: What's that?
Diablo: All that traveling and not once did we stop at Cracker Barrel.
Phoenix: You mean to tell me after all that we are right back where we started from?
Diablo: Appears that way. Ain't it great?
Phoenix: What was that all about?
Diablo: I don't know. Guess it was just about a vacation.
Phoenix: Let me see. Six days in a car. Shabby hotel rooms. Trying to use a litter box at 70 miles per hour. Tractor Trailer rumbling by. You hissing at me. Getting tossed to the back seat if I tried to get on the dashboard. Injections between the shoulder blades. Getting dragged out from underneath a bed by the scruff of the neck...or tail as was the case this morning.
Diablo: You know a lot of that could've been avoided.
Phoenix: Yeah, if we just stayed home in the first place.
Diablo: You know what I can't figure out?
Phoenix: What's that?
Diablo: All that traveling and not once did we stop at Cracker Barrel.
Monday, September 03, 2007
Fill 'Er Up
Diablo: Hee-hee-hee.
Phoenix: What is so funny?
Diablo: You look like a camel. Oh, Oh. I know. You look like the Hunch Back of Notre Dame.
Phoenix: Not funny.
Diablo: Oooo, Ooooo! How about a humpback whale?
Phoenix: Knock it off. You better hope you never need fluids.
Diablo: I’m sorry. Can I lick your face?
Phoenix: What is so funny?
Diablo: You look like a camel. Oh, Oh. I know. You look like the Hunch Back of Notre Dame.
Phoenix: Not funny.
Diablo: Oooo, Ooooo! How about a humpback whale?
Phoenix: Knock it off. You better hope you never need fluids.
Diablo: I’m sorry. Can I lick your face?
Friday, August 31, 2007
A Conspiracy?
Diablo: I bet you were scared.
Phoenix: Not until that huge pit bull came through the waiting room. Compared to the canine, the needle looked pretty tame, even if she never stuck anyone with needle before.
Diablo: What was it like?
Phoenix: Not too bad. She did a pretty good job on the first try. She told the vet it felt like taking a sewing needle and pushing through a piece of cloth.
Diablo: A piece of leather maybe?
Phoenix: I’m not that tough skinned.
Diablo: How much trouble are you going to give her? Squirming? Clawing? Any biting?
Phoenix: Well, she is feeling a bit queasy about the whole process. She actually asked the vet for some Valium. I don’t think I should pull any shenanigans. Her being a novice and all. We are talking about a needle. She mentioned to the vet that she was headed back south.
Diablo: That’s worth one good nip. Right between the forefinger and thumb.
Phoenix: No kidding. But I’ll let you have the honors. Wouldn’t want to mar my reputation.
Phoenix: Not until that huge pit bull came through the waiting room. Compared to the canine, the needle looked pretty tame, even if she never stuck anyone with needle before.
Diablo: What was it like?
Phoenix: Not too bad. She did a pretty good job on the first try. She told the vet it felt like taking a sewing needle and pushing through a piece of cloth.
Diablo: A piece of leather maybe?
Phoenix: I’m not that tough skinned.
Diablo: How much trouble are you going to give her? Squirming? Clawing? Any biting?
Phoenix: Well, she is feeling a bit queasy about the whole process. She actually asked the vet for some Valium. I don’t think I should pull any shenanigans. Her being a novice and all. We are talking about a needle. She mentioned to the vet that she was headed back south.
Diablo: That’s worth one good nip. Right between the forefinger and thumb.
Phoenix: No kidding. But I’ll let you have the honors. Wouldn’t want to mar my reputation.
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Special Diet
Diablo: Why do you get all the goodie food?
Phoenix: You mean the canned food? That's because it is a special diet.
Diablo: SO?
Phoenix: Look. You eat almost anything and you're getting a little chubby. So she doesn't feed you as much.
Diablo: I'm hungry.
Phoenix: Get use to it. If this was January you'd be a resolution.
Phoenix: You mean the canned food? That's because it is a special diet.
Diablo: SO?
Phoenix: Look. You eat almost anything and you're getting a little chubby. So she doesn't feed you as much.
Diablo: I'm hungry.
Phoenix: Get use to it. If this was January you'd be a resolution.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Better
Diablo: You feeling better?
Phoenix: Yeah, but still a little weak.
Diablo: You keep puking. On the bed, on the rug and today on the freshly laundried tablecloth and place mats.
Phoenix: Convenient at the time.
Phoenix: Yeah, but still a little weak.
Diablo: You keep puking. On the bed, on the rug and today on the freshly laundried tablecloth and place mats.
Phoenix: Convenient at the time.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Sick Kitty
Diablo: What’s wrong?
Phoenix: Kidneys, apparently.
Diablo: Shit
Phoenix: No, piss.
Diablo: Serious?
Phoenix: Pretty much. Kidneys are having a hard time cleaning up the protein residue. I have an infection. Awful thirsty, food tastes like crap…
Diablo: Ooooh, that is serious. But aren’t you kind of young to have kidney trouble.
Phoenix: The Vet had a hard time believing I am only eight. Kidney failure happens much later for us felines. Now I have to eat a special diet. You eat D/D. I eat K/D.
Diablo: D/D is for dander disease and K/D is for kidney disease?
Phoenix: Something like that.
Diablo: You know she’ll take good care of you.
Phoenix: A pill jammed down my throat twice a day ain’t much fun.
Phoenix: Kidneys, apparently.
Diablo: Shit
Phoenix: No, piss.
Diablo: Serious?
Phoenix: Pretty much. Kidneys are having a hard time cleaning up the protein residue. I have an infection. Awful thirsty, food tastes like crap…
Diablo: Ooooh, that is serious. But aren’t you kind of young to have kidney trouble.
Phoenix: The Vet had a hard time believing I am only eight. Kidney failure happens much later for us felines. Now I have to eat a special diet. You eat D/D. I eat K/D.
Diablo: D/D is for dander disease and K/D is for kidney disease?
Phoenix: Something like that.
Diablo: You know she’ll take good care of you.
Phoenix: A pill jammed down my throat twice a day ain’t much fun.
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